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Living in Luxor 2 – Marriage
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There are several kinds of marriage in Luxor but only one of them is really considered to be a ‘proper’ marriage and that is the one that takes place before God in the mosque or in the church.
Coptic men are only allowed one wife as marriage is considered to be a life-long relationship whereas a Muslim man can easily obtain a divorce. Muslim men are allowed four wives at any one time but there are special reasons under which he can take his extra wives but these reasons are, unfortunately, largely ignored.
There is a local arrangement that can be made under common law called ‘orfi’. Orfi marriages are not respected between Egyptian couples because the papers can be torn up and the relationship ended easily and it gives no protection to the divorced wife. This means that she could be abandoned and left pregnant and in disgrace.
Orfi marriages are common between Egyptian men and European women because they are not recognised as marriage only as a contract between two people saying that there is a relationship between them. If the papers are registered at the court it makes it a more binding agreement that does have consequences in that if you wanted to start another relationship you would have to formally end the first one. That is never as easy as it sounds. The arrangement is still a local one that seems to exist only in Luxor.
The main thing about the orfi marriages between Egyptians and Europeans, is that before they are considered legal in Egypt they have to be ratified by the Egyptian Embassy in Cairo. Women who are in these relationships are often asked if they “have been to Cairo”. This does not mean “Did you marry in your own embassy”. It means “Did you go to the Egyptian Embassy and register this marriage”. If you did then there will be stamps all over the papers to show that you have. Without these stamps you are not legally married you just have papers to say that you are committed to each other.
For reasons of their own, there are many foreign women in Luxor who have legal husbands in their own countries and ‘lovers’ in Luxor. This is well known and has been written about all over the Internet. It is worth making a point here that although there may be moral objections to the relationships, unless Embassies have been involved, then no laws have been broken. To be legal a marriage has to be either ratified by the Egyptian Embassy where promises have to be made that you are free to marry, or in the Embassy of the foreign participant where the same promises have to be made.
If you are British then for a marriage to be recognised in the United Kingdom it would have to take place in the Embassy in Cairo. For the marriage to be fully recognised in Egypt then it has to be ratified by the Egyptian Embassy. If neither of these things have been done then all that has happened is that you have entered an agreement that is similar to buying a car
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Without having "been to Cairo" no crime has been committed. Even if you are a widow who is free to remarry and has entered a registered orfi marriage in the Luxor courts you can still claim your widow's benefits as you are not considered to be legally married to anyone.
However, there will always be those with their own agenda who may threaten to 'expose' you to the police or other authorities for money or favours. These are hopeless threats that are without any legal standing. If it happens to you then report it to the police yourself.
One word of warning though is, if you enter into such a relationship then make sure that your family know what you have done so that it is never a shock if your actions are disclosed.
MARRIAGES BETWEEN MEN ARE NOT ALLOWED AND WOULD BE CONSIDERED AN ABOMINATION AGAINST GOD.
