Smart about Pets - Great Pets

My kids recently found one, then two, then three turtles that they were nurturing and loving.  Two of them died mysteriously and quickly, leaving us with only one little turtle.  The kids buried the two without shedding a tear, surprisingly, and seemed to move on.  It made me start to think that I definitely think having a pet - whether it's a fish, a turtle or a dog - is a good thing for kids.  I think this for many reasons. They learn responsibility.  The fish must be fed; the turtle needs rocks to bury under; and the dog needs to be walked.  But, they also learn larger things about life and death.  And they learn them in a gentle way, if death can be described as such.

Rather than first learning about death when a family member or friend dies, they learn about it when an animal dies. Now, that's not to say that it's not painful or difficult. But, it doesn't have the same impact, most of the time, as the death of a person.  Many of us remember the Cosby Show and the death of the fish.  They flushed it down the toilet and it was a big growing experience for the kids.  Pets are great in life and in death...you never know what you will learn from one and what your kids will gain.  As much as we benefit the animal, taking it in and caring for it, we benefit even more from having it.  Something to think about!

So, as I wrote in the last blog, we had three turtles that my four boys loved.  And suddenly, the big one had something coming from his nose, and then the medium one did, and the next thing we knew, they were dead.  I had never seen a dead turtle before, and it was awfully sad to see it.  But, not as sad as it was to explain to my sons.  How does one explain that their turtles have suddenly and mysteriously died.  Did they die from fighting?  Did they have a disease that my kids now had on their hands from playing with the turtles for the past week!  We didn't know what had happened, but now we needed to deal with the kids' grief and bury the turtles.

Thankfully, my husband took charge.  He scooped the turtles into a box and carted them away with my two older boys. They buried them and then one son came running into the house - he needed a permanent marker.  "For what?" I asked. "We are going to write on the rock next to the turtles mom!"  Well, duh.  So nice. So, they went out and wrote a note, "Here are the turtles we loved."  I assumed they would come in with long faces and the desire to talk.  So, when they entered, I was a bit surprised when Dan said, "That was sad.  Mom, can I have a popsicle."  And he never looked back.  Kids are funny...but, maybe it's healthy to grieve for only a bit and then move on.

My poor kids.  They found a turtle a number of months ago that they gleefully dragged home and put in a box.  Well, with some time, we found a nicer box for it and they enjoyed watching their little turtle.  Eventually, they found another and soon the box had two turtles rather that one.  Turtles are great because they are so low maintenance.  With four boys in the house, I am definitely in need of a low maintenance pet!  The kids throw some lettuce at them, watch them chew, add a bit of water, and the turtles seem to stay content.  No barking, no walking, nothing.

Well, the kids have gotten so happy with their turtles, that they've started wanting more.  So, they found another turtle and invited him into the turtle home.  This one was much larger and now we needed to get a bigger home.  We went to the hardware store and bought one of those large storage boxes that you might fold sweaters into and declared this a home.  All seemed fine.  For a day or two that is.  And then the big turtle seemed to have something coming from his nose, and so did the medium turtle.  I had no idea what it was or what to do for them.  Well, you can get where this story is going.  The next day - the two older turtles were dead.  I still don't know what happened.  Did they have a fight? Was the big one sick and he infected the medium one?  I'll never know.  But, now we had to deal with two dead turtles and four disappointed boys.  More to come about how we did that in the next instalment!

We've been asked by the neighbor to walk his dogs once a day while his family is away. He's home working while they travel for a few weeks and he's asked us to step in each afternoon.  My five year old has been begging for a dog, particularly since his died a few years ago, and Jay (the neighbor) figured that this would be a nice way to make my son feel good.  Feel good for him - chaos for me! Since it's not part of our daily routine, I've been finding it hard to find the time to walk the dogs.  There are three dogs - and I have four children under 7 to watch!  So, we try to squeeze in our dog walking between this one's nap and that one's swim lessons, etc.  You get the idea.  My five year old is in heaven, of course, and that is making it all worth while. 

Yesterday, we forgot to walk them.  Completely forgot.  And I pictures them at home all afternoon with their legs crossed, wondering when that absent minded woman was going to show up.  Oh dear.  We failed that one. But, other than that day, we've been pretty good about going to Jay's each day.  Hopefully, when his family returns, my son will be able to let go and will feel satisfied with the work that he's done.  That's what I'm hoping at least...because I don't think that I can maintain this for too much longer!

My son wants a pet.  He's wanted one for quite awhile and we are just not ready to commit to an animal.  With four wild boys in the house, we have all the animals we can handle.  So, what's a mother to do?  At the moment, I'm bribing him with a stuffed animal.  Lame, I know.  But, I'm desperate and it seems to be working. I've promised him that we will go to one of those Build A Bear places where he can pick out any version of the cutest stuffed animal in the world that he wants.  This company is amazing.  He can pick out the heart to put in its body and watch as they "build" his bear.  Then, he can pick out clothes for his bear and make a birth certificate for it.  He can even name his little creation.

Ok - so it won't cuddle with him in bed and make for adorable bonding experiences.  But, it also won't bark in the middle of the night and demand to be walked at all hours.  It won't cost money for food and veterinarian shots.  And, it's his very own.  He doesn't even need to share this pet with his brothers.

No, this solution won't work for everyone, but it seems to be working for us.  He's forgotten about his quest for a real animal for the moment and is focusing on his exciting trip to the mall.  I can't guarantee that this excitement will last forever, but it's paying off for now.  One day at a time!