And he is gone.....

Dec 10, 2007 at 16:04 o\clock

And he is gone.....

Mood: sad

So, December 10, 2007 is the day it starts.  There I stood. Aaliyah in my arms and Rachel playing at my feet. "When I call your name, get in the bus." I hear a man bellow. "Sgt. Gulley!" My heart skips a beat. No! Not yet! I'm thinking to myself. I'm not ready! He picks up his bags, takes a few steps towards the bus, then drops his bags and runs towards us. I opened my arms as wide as I could, taking him into my arms as much as I could. "I love you, I love you. You're gonna be okay." He whispers into my ears. The tears begin to fall, running down my cheeks. Rachel looks up at me, "You crying mommy? You okay?" I tell her that Mommy is fine. I watch him step on the bus. At first, I can't move. I want to follow him, but I can't. I finally muster up the strength to walk towards the bus. I stand outside, towards the rear end of the bus. He looks at me through the window. We exchange air-blown kisses, and I approuch the window. I touch my hand to the cold glass when a uniformed soldier comes from behind me, giving Brandon a motion to open the window, but he doesn't. He shakes his head, saying that he won't....he can't. I know he did it for a reason. Why make our good-bye harder than it already was. I take a few steps back, I embrace with military wife after military wife. All of us telling each other that we can make it, we'll be okay, but I can hear the doubt and fear in all of their voices as well as my own. The buses start their engines and my heart skips another beat. After a few minutes, which are passing way too fast, the wheels start turning, and I anxiously wait to see his face one last time before he leaves. More kisses flying through the air, more tears flowing from my eyes. Farewell my love, be safe. I tell him with my eyes.So, now, here I am. I feel okay. Sad that he is gone, but proud that he is doing his job with valor. An hour ago, I lay on my sofa crying enough tears to fill an olympic sized pool, saying to myself....What am I going to do? How will I survive? And now, I'm fine. Saying, we will survive another deployment apart, and our love will grow throughout this ordeal. Typical, my emotions will be a roller coaster ride until his deployment comes to an end. I'm glad that I have family and friends to help me through this. To you, Brandon, my beloved husband, Know that I will be here, watching over and taking care of our beautiful girls. Telling them everyday about how wonderful their father is and that they will be in your arms sooner than they think. At the same time, I'm telling myself the same....that soon I will be where the world becomes complete....in your arms. September seems like an eternity....but soon, my love, we will be together soon.